There is a Mexican restaurant that sits on Broadway a few doors down from the pasta factory where you can sit at a counter placed in front of the window and watch the traffic go by while you eat your fish tacos. They have the best fish tacos in town, searing their fish instead of using the deep fried breaded fish or what are sometimes referred to as Baja Fish Tacos. Which are the type of fish tacos I first ate in southern California in a little cafe south of Redondo Beach where a friend of mine lived and grew up and where other friends moved from when they came to the midwest.
Rocket was over last night. The fish tacos were 'interesting' he thought and ate a bunch. I followed the recipe and will, next time, put in some more of the chilis and use different onions and..well, make it mine and better, I think. It was okay. No one else likes the fruit salsa like I do. The fruit and avocado salsa, which is fine.
The thing about men friends is that you get a different perspective. Also, really, men need to be civilized, don't they?..So we talked, or, he talked primarily and then we watched Youtube videos, guitarists, you know; Phil Kegey, Jeff Beck and Jack White, who really has a good grounding in the blues (he had no idea, I provided that tidbit) and then, goodnight, goodnight and he left, it was nearly eleven.
At midnight I was still reading my bible before going to sleep because, you see, we talked about the bible, about God, about Jesus, alot. That is his thing, oh yes, and music. Syncopation, rhythm, blues. And something was just, well, bothering. Something...so I wrote which is my way of figuring out this mess of a brain. And in writing discovered something: All of my talk, blather really, about waiting on God?..Waiting on God to do what I want....to give me what I desire, as if God is some great jin or genie or magician...'the center cannot hold'...t.s. Eliot wrote. It can't. Not when there is no center. Not when the center is me.
Dylan comes home today.
Maybe I'll have fish tacos for lunch.
And maybe, instead of 'my will', I'll do it right, finally, and say 'thy will'....